Nothing
is ever perfect, there’s neither a book nor movie in the world that is completely free
from error. In fact I think it would be of some extreme arrogance if something
claimed to be completely perfect. Hell, "Citizen Kane" is supposedly the greatest
movie ever made and that has one of the most glaring plot holes of all time in
it! And have you ever read “Carrie” by Stephen King? That has more holes in it
than Swiss cheese!
Anyway, I reckon Les Miserables is perhaps the greatest novel and musical of
all time, but is by no means perfect. With that in mind I’ve compiled a list of
some of the errors and plot holes I’ve noticed in Les Mis that stop it from
earning the crown for awesomest thing in the world, which it bloody well should
have!! (This isn’t a countdown like my other lists by the way, none of these
flaws bother me more than the others, the order is just the order I wrote them
in).
- Fantine is still desirable
as a prostitute despite the fact she has no hair or teeth
OK I admit this is slightly distasteful of me to point out,
but does anyone else think it’s kind of a flaw in the story of Fantine that
even after she’s had her head shaved and her teeth pulled out men still want to
pay to have sex with her? This is more of a flaw in the musical, as the passage
of time is almost nothing compared to the book where her downfall takes place
over several months. I would imagine in that amount of time her hair would have
grown back again and she might have even looked attractive again, but in the
musical, and the recent movie adaptation especially, it seems like everything
happens to her in the space of a day. It’s probably more of just a flaw in the
timing of the movie, but it still bothers me.
Yeah I know that not all prostitutes look like Julia Roberts in “Pretty Woman”
and most men who are willing to pay for sex aren’t going to be that picky, but
I personally think it’s ridiculous that if she’s supposed to be so unattractive
and downtrodden men would still pay to get off with her.
- The time it took for Valjean
to rescue Marius from the barricade
This is a flaw in both the book and the recent movie; I’ll explain what I
mean by it. In the movie Gavroche goes to Valjean to deliver a letter from
Marius at the barricades, and it’s night time at that point, that same night Valjean goes to the
barricade to find Marius, it’s daylight again when all the lads at the
barricade die and when Valjean drags Marius into the sewers. HOWEVER it’s night-time
again when Valjean eventually gets out of the sewers, which means that Valjean
left Cosette alone in their house for AN ENTIRE DAY without so much as a note
saying where he’d gone. He could have been shot dead at that barricade, why would he take such a big risk with his life and not even leave Cosette any instruction of what to do if something were to happen to him?
That’s a big enough flaw as it is, but I think what
makes it an even bigger flaw is that no one even mentions this for the rest of
the movie! Did Cosette not think to ask where her father had been all day and
why exactly he was covered in shit when he eventually came home? And why did
Marius not realise sooner that Valjean was the one who had saved him
considering they were the only two people who survived the barricades? Oh dear
lord the levels of flaw just go deeper and deeper! I’m actually starting to
question if Les Miserables is actually as good as I think it is!
·
- Cosette doesn’t remember
anything about her past
Poor Cosette, she keeps showing up on these lists of mine. It’s
her own damn fault though! I do like to keep bringing this up don’t I? But one of the biggest flaws in
Les Mis is the fact that Cosette doesn’t remember a thing about her life before
Valjean rescued her from The Thenardiers. It would be a lot easier to forgive
this flaw if say she was younger when Valjean got her, but at eight years old
there’s no excuse for forgetting these things. Especially when you consider the
fact that she had been living with The Thenardiers for six years, which was
most of her life at that point!
It makes even less sense in the latest movie, because during one scene she
clearly states that she remembers being lost in the woods when she was a child,
yet earlier in the film she was stood right in front of Thenardier and she
didn’t recognise him. A little consistency in her character is all I ask!
Cosette is either exceptionally good at repression, or she’s just incredibly
stupid, and I could go either way in that regards.
I
think this flaw bothers me so much because I find it to be a real insult to
anyone who’s ever suffered abuse in their life. Just because the pain stops it
doesn’t mean the bad memories go away so easily, I don’t care how good your
life is afterwards you wouldn’t be able to just forget that stuff in an instant,
Six years of physical and mental abuse as a child is enough to fuck someone up
severely for the rest of their life, and I think Les Mis would have been a lot
better, or at least more realistic if they just once showed Cosette dealing
with some of that trauma. Not everyone who suffers gets such a happy ending;
life just doesn’t work like that unfortunately.
- Valjean made the wrong decision to
turn himself in
This isn’t really a flaw per se, or a plot hole, or
really an error of any kind, but I’ve been dying to bring this up for ages I
just couldn’t find a way of shoehorning it in anywhere. I probably should have
put it on my list of things that piss me off, but I forgot about it.
I have a real problem with the way Jean Valjean handled
the situation he found himself in when he thought another guy was going to go
to prison because of him. I really think he made the wrong decision in deciding
to turn himself in, mainly because it wasn’t just his life at stake; there were
other people to consider.
First of all there was Fantine and Cosette; I think those
two needed Valjeans concern more than a common thief who had the misfortune to
be caught. I’m not saying it wasn’t noble of Valjean to reveal his identity,
but I think there was probably other ways of handling it. Fantine was dying and
Valjean knew bloody well that she didn’t have a lot of time left and if he
hadn’t spent so much time fucking around trying to decide what was morally
right to do Fantine wouldn’t have died such a horrible lonely death. Yes it was
already too late to save Fantine, but it wasn’t necessary to make her suffer
even more than she already had was it? I
actually recently re-read Les Miserables and I found myself a lot more upset at
Fantines suffering and death than I was the first time I read it, mostly
because I knew what was coming and I found it very distressing that she had no
idea how bad things were going to get. Valjean should have gotten Cosette to
her in time and not prolonged her suffering, that would have been a much better
use of his time.
I do feel bad for the guy who got caught stealing and was
mistaken for Valjean, but I really don’t think Valjean should have felt so
guilty about it. Whatever decision that guy made he was an adult and he chose
to steal, Fantine did not choose to have everyone shit all over her, that was
something that was done to her by other people.
It’s not even just about Fantine either, there was an
entire town that was relying on him and his ideas to survive and it all went to
shit because of the decision he made. It’s not often I find myself quoting Star
Trek, but for this example I find it necessary. “The needs of the many outweigh
the needs of the few”, and in this case I find that quote to be very true,
Valjean should have realised there was a greater need in his town than the
needs of one guy. It’s all very well to be noble and to think you’re doing the
right thing but I think sometimes you just have to throw someone under a bus to
make things better for the majority. I’m sorry if that sounds harsh but it’s
only what I think of that part of the novel and not for all of humanity.
Basically what I’m saying is that you can’t save everyone, and Valjean should
have seen that there was a bigger need in his town than the need of just one
guy.
There’s probably more flaws in Les Miserables than just
these four, but to be honest I don’t want to be sat here all night poking holes
in something I love. Although I think that may be what the Internet was
actually invented for.
Apart from these four things I still think Les Miserables
is awesome, you did a damn fine job Victor Hugo, you should be very proud!
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